aggravate, annoy, bother, bug, chafe, exasperate, gall, get, grate, irk, nettle, peeve, persecute, pique, put out, rasp, rile, vex.



it all started with a word.
lets make a guess?
but there'll be no prize though.



ytd when i told my frds abt the joke of the day, a few responded.
one of them was nigel.
asked me who's my long lost brainy frd.
then he said something abt being my sec sch brainy frd.
and i know he might be reading this now.





but look at my face? i dont care. hahah, just joking?
and yeah, good luck fer you and your fishy ger/princess/fish? hahah.
fishy? fishie? ahhahaha.
or mrs goh? tsk tsk. (note, mrs goh is my pri sch DM and she's an old hag i swear)




i had fun last night, just talking to them abt stuff.
and clement!
i forgot what i wanna say.




today.. started off bad somehow.
it ended off frozen.
coz it was raining.
fucking heavily.
reached home, drenched somehow, and i ko on the spot.
tmr.. a customer will be late.
cool? good?
-.-'' just know that the guys are looking forward to the 23rd?
hmm and i wonder if ice's going..




oh yes, before i forget..
to joey's gf.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY~!!
though i've already msg-ed you and i got back some funny replies.
HAHAHA.





i'm done fer tonight, not much interesting things happened today.
boss told me something funny but aint as funny compared to the joke of ytd.

joke of the day:



walking home from work, the china man approached me, actually didnt wanna stop till he screamed and caught my attention.
i was in a daze when he was telling me that he's from blah blah blah and he needed some money fer survival.
being fucked up and i asked, how much does he need?
he said its up to me and i asked again then he said that he needed ten over dollars to tide him thru, at least fer a few meals.
i gave him a blank look and said..
i dont have the money, then he asked me if i have my ATM card with me, replied i dont have and he asked fer a few bucks in the end.
i said, 'i have got less than a dollar with me now.'
he gave me a fucked up look and apologised and went off.



morale of the story.
china men are not stupid after all.
perhaps too smart fer locals so yeah we gotta act dumb to protect ourselves.
still can ask me if i have my ATM card.
-.-''
yeah, i was abt to reply..
how abt some hell notes fer you?
i bet it'll be enough to tide you thru fer quite awhile.
its not abt the money.
if i ever have a chance to work overseas, i'll make sure that i wont end up like that guy.
sucha disgrace, i wonder if he ever thought of that.
thats just not the way to con someone.
perhaps i just look dumb to him.
with my as usual f up face.





if i see ever see him again, i'll really make sure i'll get some hell notes fer him.

oh, i've figured it all out.
ulterior motives.
haha.





been feeling a lil off track recently, luckily, i still keep track of the dates and happenings, more or less.
about my words and all. didnt notice it till a frd pointed it out to me.
been on the quite extreme side lately..
and to think that i was plannin to avoid this frd.
the frd is.. just a lil too loud, too irritating at times and crappy. (no, shld be most of the times..)
cant take it somehow.
fer me, it depends on the people i'm with and lastly, my feelings at that very moment.
but so happened that this frd of mine can be pretty loud anytime, anywhere.
amusing, its the crap that makes this frd of mine stands out. somewhat.
and tragically, ANOTHER frd of mine is becoming like that too.
and i named them the screwed up gang. (or couple? haha.)
the both of them, know each other, but not on very close terms.
hmm..
qn me if you find this puzzling/amusing/irritating (which i find it highly amusing), no names or genders are being mentioned, specifically.
fer a reason of coz.
no satisfied responses guaranteed.



i thought that i just need to get them off my back fer awhile.
i'm done.

today i realised quite alot of things.
yeah, i'm not into frdster but yeah i was on frdster just now and came across this profile.
saw the pics.
uh.. i'm happy. somehow. fer that person.
if you get what i mean.




fer your info, my profile and pics on frdster doesnt reflect whats going on in my life.
i put pics there coz i like it.
and the profile customized so that there'll be no access fer nonsensical peeps out there.
point seen and taken?





im talking to jing jun now.
thought back abt the days that i always get her into troubles, and she became chao jun instead of jing jun.
HAHAHAHHA.
those were the times, the recesses that we spent, with xiu yun and zheng wen.
then she shifted to some areas.
and etc etc..
sigh.



but am glad that we've been talking all along.
once in a few yrs kind?
the last time i contacted her was after o's?
i dno, i know she's doing fine. she will be.
after all she's so brainy.




its been good having her back again!
=)
those times, i'll never forget, somehow.

a frd was being nice to me today.
if you feel irritated or sad, can always vent your frustrations on me.
thats what i was being told. then again, being ME, it just aint my style.
i do get irritated, who doesnt?
i allow it to happen, but i dont make my surroundings bear the shit with me.
i'm not aiming anyone here, in case there are some sensitive shit out there.
i dont wish to get questioned abt the things i blog.




a frd judged me, passing this remark that i appear to be .. shall not elaborate.
felt kinda weird.
reacted quite f up, it aint easy to understand me.
minus my family of coz..
seriously, dont act like you know me inside out when you dont.
you'll get screwed.



thats not the point.
i'm just typing out how i feel.
what was on my mind and etc.
here, noone judge me.
like the way i do.
haha!




its 27th nov, happy birthday ben, though i know that you wont get to see this.

its gonna be december soon..
how time flies.
certain things, it doesnt feel right.
i cant pretend that everything's fine.
the best way to kill someone mentally is to strike when one's feeling like me.
hahaha.
then again,
killed by you, it aint the first time, but it wont happen again.


i cant and i WONT.
know what am i doing?
yeah sure.
i'm mentally awake.
realising whats happening to me, to US and the surroundings.
what about you?
say something wont you?
if not.. whats the point?
if you dont know what im talking about.
yeah, fuck it,
forget it.


i want to sleep.
tired and a little empty..




*self delusion. i live in the reality.

today's the 19th, i meant just now.
time flies.
goodnight.
i'm so tired..

失去妳,　愛恨開始分明.　失去妳,　還有什麼事好關心.


為妳彈奏蕭邦的夜曲,　紀念我死去的愛情.
跟夜風一樣的聲音,　心碎的很好聽.




對妳心跳的感應,是如此溫熱親近..

can i be selfish fer once?
try being in my shoes, it sucks.

i reckoned that its human's nature to rmb only the flaws of another..
??




last night caught harry potter with TWO Roys.
it feels kinda weird, i was seated in btw them.
-.-''
slept pretty late last night.
i forgot and throughout the night i kept waking up.
i had a nightmare.
a long and real one.
seriously got freaked out.
and when i got up, i realised that i'm still in that nightmare.





living hell i swear.
certain things i pondered on, i guessed that i'll never figure out the answers..







that night you walked away, the sight that i'll never forget.
if you really care abt me or love me, you wldnt have done this.
i dno how am i supposed to feel towards you.
just dont wish to cont living in this nightmare anymore.
a nightmare that is real, that features you and is.




*headache.
i find it so hard to sleep nowadays.

it took me awhile to realise that its the nineteen.
i thought abt last year.
thought abt the yr before last yr..
kinda.. i dont know how to explain.


whats the use of blogging it down?
i wondered how will later on be like..



its gonna be a long day by myself..
i seriously cant helped but thought of you.
i wondered if you thought of me too.
days without you are somekind weird.
somehow, somewhere, somewhat.

my dearest and i =)


here is how my night went:
swts knocked off early, came over fer dinner.
my area..
nothing much.
went home fer awhile, buddy called.
came over to my place.
11plus near 12, till now, she just left, jus sent her off to hail a cab..
its been fuckin long since i last saw her?
let me recall, it was 24th sept..
yeah. 23rd's a date i wont forget.
outta point.
AND I MANAGED TO TAKE A PIC WITH YEAN!
seriously, fuck it, its been so long.
she got her bf and work to be busy with.
while i got my own shits to be busy with.
its been real long i swear.
longer than i meet my guys.
longer than i meet my gers.
simply said. i miss her. really i do.
imagine, in the past i used to see her everyday, including my off days.
but nowadays, i only get to see her once every few mths.
so.. yeah.

at joey's place now..
using her lappie.
steamboat was.. good.



nothing much, most prolly will die at home tmr.
waiting fer my turn to bathe?
well. and turn in early.
goodnight.


not forgetting, joey, happy bday!
in advance?
=)

I've given every moment I had
Still I can never seem to keep up with you
You're done with one mile, and on to another one thousand
Still I could never seem to keep up with you
I know you'll be better off without me when I'm gone
You know you're beautiful
You're beautiful
[Chorus]
Shine on
You were made to shine on
and you know I love you
even if we can or can't be friends I'll be with you till the very end
Shine on
You were made to


It's keeping me awake everynight
But I can never seem to give up on you
I send up a prayer and I'm on to another one thousand
But I can never seem to give up on you
I know you'll be better off without me when I'm gone
You know you're beautiful
You're beautiful
[Chorus]
Shine on
You were made to shine on
and you know I love you
even if we can or can't be friends I'll be with you till the very end
Shine onYou were made to
Nobody's wrong
Nobody's right
Keep moving on
Shine on
You were made to shine on

[Chorus]
Shine on
You were made to shine on
and you know I love you
even if we can or can't be friends

You're gonna be better than you've ever been so
Shine on
You're gonna be just fine
You're gonna be alright love
You're gonna be just fine
You're gonna be alright love



this song is nice!
and somehow i thought of myself.
hmm..
goodnight.

this is..


MADNESS!!!



disgustingly mad.

omg omg omg.
ive been hearing this since the moment he was on the phone.
the way he talks reminds me of someone moronic apparently.
and i got highly irritated, somehow.
but then, i shall keep my mouth shut.
GOODNIGHT.

this volcano, which has been keeping alot of heat inside.
is finally on the way to erupt.
why does volcano erupt?
from what i vaguely rmb, it has sth to do with the plates underneath moving and shifting and i dont know what?
well, apparently, i've returned my stuff to ms tan.
WHO CARES.




when a volcano erupts, those lava shit will flow and alot of people will get killed, if they're around the area.
its unstoppable.
unpredictable.
what else?
i've forgotten.




about to erupt.
slowly erupting.
imagination unleashed.
i wondered who's gonna get killed.

yeah i will shut the fuck up.
goodnight.
not pissed.
just empty.

november's chopin.
anyone knows what chopin stands fer?

lesser people. just look at the background of the pic.
mesmerized.

TAKE MY BREATH AWAY.








taken near the beach.. early in the bloody morning.

i wondered if you know.
thats NOT the point.
know why i dint want to have a tag board?
coz i dont wish to tag myself.
-.-''
esp when this blog is kinda private.
though ive got links..

a chance, thats what i need.
a chance to make everything right.
a chance to make myself feel better.



a chance to get more sleep.
oh well.




time to bathe and knock out.
mentally abused.

did i mention that i love clement alot?
despite the fact that we dint talk much in the past.
and he changed alot.
fer the better of coz.
=)
and i considered him as one of my frds..
lol.

i just dint realised that it'll hurt so bad.
just by my own thoughts, i got killed.
cant imagine what'll happen next.
like what people say.. "the future is unpredictable.."


bball competition? i'm going down to dover soon.
meeting my frd. giving another frd a SURPRISE!
HAHAHAHA.

i'm back..
been kinda busy.
last night made me realised quite alot of stuff.
from the necessary stuff to the redundant stuff.
alot alot.
the trip was average.
coz it was only the THREE of us, its just like me and my frds going out..
then agn, i had no probs gg out with my frds here, be it THREE or FIVE of us.




over there, i was easily irritatable and fucking pissed fer 4days.
yeah.. and my last night there, i was alone fer awhile at causeway bay.
i didnt like what they had fer dinner on that night, so.. i decided NOT to eat with them.
that night was cool, it was halloween's eve, and i saw ALOT of funny and weird people on the street.. the event was pretty grand over there anyway.



ah.. disneyland was alright. hahaha. "alright", this word i've been using recently.
no particular strong good/bad feelings.
stayed there from 3plus-8plus. haven been sleeping much lately.
went fer some city tour shit.
early in the morning, i was at this nice beach with ivy.
wanted to take more pics but i was freezing.
-.-''
not forgetting, certain songs never fail to make me feel THIS WAY.
i really dont want to make myself feel miserable coz of the things you do.



i'm beginning to loathe you.
soon, it'll turn to hatred.
perhaps the hatred with fade with time..
PERHAPS NOT.


//those tears wont fall again. not fer you. directly/indirectly.