getting lazier to blog...
here's a recap:


a week back, i met up with mama, kinky boy decided to abandon us for another guy.. tsk. unexpectedly, he was free much earlier. i think that mama was deprived of sleep, we met for lunch, after which, she went home to rest. the day before i met mama, i bought crystal bracelet and a crystal pendant for b and myself.



weekdays = work = tiring



today, was out in town, almost spent 400 on a nylon material Burberry bag.
i wondered when can i seriously learn to be more thrifty.
okay.. exams coming.
seriously need to eat those papers again.
bless me.

to a friend of mine:

perhaps you might not even get to see this.
but i just want to tell you this.
be strong, don't let a wimp bring you down, for you deserve so much better than IT.
if you need to be back to who you are, be so, coz end of the day, you just need to be accountable to yourself.



this is something that i used to share with my bitchers.
though they might be leading their own lives now and i had almost turned them to be players.
they were what others said to be:
majorly screwed.. but they know what they are doing.
they know of their worthiness.
lastly..
they are accountable to themselves.



lastly, be happy.
perhaps it might sound selfish to others, but as my friend, i hope for the best of you. if i have to choose for either one to be hurt, i would rather it be the one who is in the game with you.




life is full of shit.
don't be filled with it.
lastly.. i have said this many times before..
stupidity is incurable.



love,
xx

to err is human, to forgive divine.



it's sucha holy idiom.
apparently, it became a perfect idiom for idiots to abuse.



to err is human, but that doesnt give you a reason to err more.
this is going out to all those idiots who think that they are overly smart.
this is also going out to those fckers who think that they are god.



coz in my eyes, there is no human who can be god.
no matter how rich you are.. there will be a day whereby you will go home with the lord.
no offence to christians... but..



NO GOD, ONLY DOG IN MY LIFE.

okay, firstly, not much people can seriously really get on my nerves like that.
they are either overly-smart with overwhelming wits OR they do not even have the slightest and basic wits.
which is which, you decide.



i received a call on saturday afternoon, i missed it coz i was out, getting my food.
it was a call to ask me to meet.
from my vague memory, i recalled that perhaps out of 10 times, there were at least 5 times that i met that arse.



perhaps people might not know..
it has really been god know how long since i had family reunion with mama and kinky.
my side tons had happened and i was busy with work and school.
i know that they are busy too.
THAT IS WHY I GET EVEN MORE IRRITATED WHEN SOMEONE TOLD ME THAT SOMEONE CAN'T JOIN US LATER.




reason being:
let's call the either overly-smart or stupid friend A.
A knows this guy for a year but they have never meet. according to A, that guy owes A both present and movie and he is always too busy to meet A.



SIMPLE AS THAT.
i text A kinda late last night, i was confirming the time with mama.
okay.. this is what i got back.
A has always been known for being an emo kid.
no one could tell me about it, not even A him/herself.
i am NOT gonna disclose who A is.
it should be a piece of shit for people who know to guess it.



i text A this:-


you best.. for a guy, for a present. then again, it's you, so i got nothing to say. enjoy yourself and get ditched again.


A replied:-


he is not my type.. tsk tsk.. pls.. if he is my type i long ago meet him already right? sigh.



A, i don't know if you'll be reading this.
but if you were, let me tell you this..
i cannot ASSUME THAT YOU DON'T LIKE THIS NEW GUY.
you use your brains and think about it.
how many zillion guys you have liked before?
which of them you always said that you are serious with them?




and you seriously resemble of the stupidest girl that i used to know.
among all idiots, you chose to resemble her.
WTF.
this is not a sad case.
THIS IS DEFINITELY A HOPELESS CASE.

for many reasons.. i just cannot find a reason for human to be so stupid.
seriously.. i believe in human rights.
that includes blogging whatever the owner feels like.
as long as it ain't political or offends the government.



as long as no name is stated, it is not really aiming at that particular someone, unless that particular someone thinks that it's that person.



hmm..
okay, i'm trying to talk to myself nicely..
and mama was using her colourful adjectives nicely on the phone.
then again, there is only one such type of person that deserves her colourful adjectives.



needless to say, everyone knows who that person is.
tsk.
sad case.

to cousin, his wifey, AV and prince of VANITY,



i'm so sorry about the delay to link the great blogs of yours, know me for me, i'm just.. too lazy.. (mainly) and i'm very much busy with my new job and lastly, i'm contemplating if i should register a business under my name.



too much research for me to do.
family + gf + studies and now.. + a lot more things to do.




and yes kinky boy, i'm sorry for not being able to meet you and mama as well.
TGIF!
it's friday and i'll be having night classes later.
HOW NICE YEAH?

mama told me that the game is on.
sit back and relax.

till the break of dawn;
to me, ego trip is a trip of my ego taken alone.
it is being nonchalant and oblivious to everything surrounding me.
years back, i made this decision to try it once.
somewhat i got used to it. it moulded me into someone that i would not want to be.
years later, i blended back into the humane environment..
but it seriously do hurt.
especially when i got into troubles that i can't solve.



back then, there wasn't any problem that i couldn't solve.
i mean..
being me for me.
yours ever truly trouble getter;
i always get into other people troubles.
one prominent one is the ever oh so classic "friend" who is a mother of a child now.
if you get it, you get it.. if you don't. be glad.
for that few years, my life was on a highway.
it was a highway to hell.



2006-2007 first half of the year, my work was on a highway to hell.
busy, hectic, busy hectic.
second half, i was busy looking for a comfort zone.



i failed terribly.
floated.
floated.
floated.
floated.




now.. i am not lost.
but neither am i very happy.
perhaps once the feeling is lost, it can never be recovered.
it is just like love....
but love is different. if it is really love, it should not fade in the first place.
even if alot had happened, the love will still be there..





love is.. when i do not need to take an ego trip ever again.

too intense to verbalise.
someone please tell me about it.

well trouble strikes.
it comes as a whole.
sometimes they are just too much to take..

hello. text or call me soon.
we need to meet.
:)

i dont hate my work for now.. which is quite a big improvement.
however, there is still room for it.
i hate the people there.
especially that bitch, she's fcking political.




bitch, if i were to play.
it'll be MY game.
knowing me for me.
;)
try me.

fcking shit.
it's gonna be friday, finally!!!
work has been so hectic, whenever after i bathed, i have to pop in two pills.
zzz.

hey toytoy.
i wonder if you're reading this.
but please continue to help me feed this poor dying birdy.
and yes i miss you!!

my monday night.. after meeting my dearest kinky boy..




mama, as promised.
LOL.

overall i had a quite tiring weekend.
work is shit as usual.
any idea how much i really hate my job now?
if it ain't for the sake of money, man, i would have fcked the shit outta those motherfckas.
pcb.



SIGH.
life is a mofo bitch.
i really had enough of it.
this year, i don't expect much, but neither do i expect it to kick my arse.
ARGH.



let me die in peace.
but before that, let me die with glory.

it is sickening and yet amazing how things can changed overnight.
well, provided if the changes are good.
if they are bad..
apparently, they kill.
perhaps in my case, not for the one who is directly involved..
but the one who is involved with the parties.
if you get it, good for you.
if you don't.. too bad.



sorry to those friends whom i currently cannot afford to meet up.
coz things aren't in control yet.
i'm still trying my best to digest the fact.
it's a lifetime nightmare afterall we are talking about here.



and to you:

i love you through and through.
we'll go through this nightmare together..

i got no mood to blog.
not anymore.
too much things happened within such a short time.
give me some time to accept.

dearest Mama and Kinky boy



hereby wishing the both of you a VERY HAPPY PROSPEROUS CNY!
omfg. i will miss the nonsense from kinky boy and mama..
HAHAHAHAA.
miss me too and please don't kill me.
much love...


xoxo,
dotter

i am officially smitten over this sissy.
LOL.